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THE INTROVERT ADVANTAGE

Am adding to the collective consciousness of self awareness by proclaiming this book. By Marti Olsen Laney. The dictionary definition of introvert is wonderfully busted. Nicely analyzed - leading to "aha's" and not "ohmygod's".
Leading to 'tools' for communication with self and the world. Leading to understanding. Tumble out words and do your stuff........

BIRD BEHAVIOUR

Yesterday morning at the Deli the crow who won me in a poker game (or whatever it is crows do to establish humanitory) ignored the piece of bagel but eagerly hopped toward another offer of peanut. Good lord, even the birds are affected by Atkins, thought I. Then, willing to test this bubble of a theory, I soaked a piece of bagel in tea and put it down. Sure enough, bagel was eaten - but only half of it! When crow John Wayne'd it over to consider a peanut meant for the sparrows a sparrow swooped across and lifted away the piece of bagel. Crow glanced back over shoulder at the theft. If it made a comment I missed it.

But I did get to thinking about all the to-do (is this how it is spelled?) around food. Atkins, Eat Right for Your Blood Type, chew each mouthful a hundred times, One Bowl, Eating Awareness Training.......... Ooodles more. Except for the last two the enjoyment of food seems to be lost in the issues. Which I find really sad. So I sighed, and tried to pay attention, to eating my own pieces of bagel, with their dollops of peanut butter, slowly, and with enjoyment.

SLOW LIFE

...IN PROGRESS....

ENLIGHTENING

How to know when you've touched core, felt purpose, lived the moment.

The body suddenly is completely filled with breath, like one great lung, effortlessly. And the mouth curves into a smile.

Having experienced this and wanting it again we mimic the motions: uplift the mouth, inhabit the body, use the 'tools' that have proved effective. Confidently, if not patiently, wait...

Numbers

Do numbers have power in themselves? I really haven't yet come up with a definite answer on this.

Certainly enough experiences around such a notion convince me that something is going on! And I will choose one number over another or let myself be guided in a decision by numbers or look to number sources for direction. Why not.

For the moment I think the key is awareness. Opening to the possibility. If I think the number eight is about prosperity and I see a license plate with three eights on it I am likely to open more to that prosperity channel in me and be receptive to the abundance around me, look down and see the loonie on the sidewalk that several people have just walked by, 'chance' upon a friend who invites me to lunch, find a cheque in the mail along with the bills, delight in the wealth of a perfectly fitting pair of shoes.

Natural Regard

Nature is constantly looking at us, human and otherwise. We are a curious bunch!

The experience of 'looking back' is multi-faceted: it expands with practice.

Two-eyed creatures are readily engaged in a mutual appraisal. People with pets know this. Dogs and cats and horses, for sure. Budgies and turtles and guppies are more fleeting and more dramatic. Nature unfettered gives the satisfaction of something wild captured for a brief moment in a stare: chickadee, seal, ladybug, heron, slug..........

A rock is one big eye.

Gaze on a tree in its winter bare state and wait on the realization that it is a multitude of eyes; in summer the leaves are its eyelashes.

A willow tree just after a rain, when the sun pops out and the wind shows off the shimmer, wins its staring contest with me: I have to close my eyes in overwhelm.

Striving...(cont.)

I could have said, "The 78 Datsun 510" but realized, if he was not acquainted with such a wonderful vehicle, this would mean nothing and could be off putting.

Whereas "the brown Datsun wagon," was simpler, straight-forward and opened the door for him to exclaim "Oh, wow, a 510 wagon - what year - my brother once owned one and he........"

However that door never got even a chance of opening. It was only later that I followed an alternate conversation. (It is one form my writing takes, this dialogue with self, after the fact.)

At the time I pointed with my free arm and said, "It's the Nissan."

Striving For Clarity

Yet another adventure of the scope of communication:

Recently I was met with an occasion to tell a man what kind of car I drove. He was selling me a drill, being nicely helpful, not at all patronizing, had just pointed out that the $29 model would serve my needs adequately. I eyed this much-cheaper-than-I-had-expected-to-have-to-pay item with doubt. (Being pleasantly surprised, as it tends to do, would come later).

"What's the difference between this one and the $69 one?" I asked.

"It's like the difference between cars, um, say a - " he hesitated.

"A VW and a Lincoln?" I chirped in.

He looked a bit startled at this comparison but recouped with a laugh, "More like a VW and a Buick."

Now, I was betraying age because nowdays a VW is not considered a cheap(er) car. And I thought Buicks and Lincolns shared equal poshness but learned something from this gent about car hierarchy.

Anyway - it occurred to me a paragraph or so ago that this was NOT the occasion when I had to identify my car but having started recounting the incident I felt I had to finish it.

The car identifying; this time I'm pretty sure I'm headed in the right direction.

I was trugging driftwood up from the ocean, both arms engaged, purse swinging from elbow and threatening to trip me. Having made it up the incline from the beach I reached the sidewalk. My car was about ten cars along the roadway. The load under my left arm was shifting and I stopped to do a one arm wriggle to re-establish it without having to lay down the two longer pieces I was dragging with my right hand.

Several people passed me and smiled. I had on my "No, really, I'm fine," look. One can perfect such a shield of independence.

But I must have quirked an eyebrow in the facade - or perhaps he was used to such tactics and realized the worth of sidestepping them - for a man stopped and asked if he could help while making definite motions to relieve me of the two pieces of wood I had been dragging. I gave them up gratefully.

"Which car?" he asked as we started along the row. (cont...)